Ruth Bader Ginsberg stays up furiously sharpening pencils

Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg has spent the evening in her office sharpening every pencil she could find in preparation to welcome her new colleague Brett Kavanaugh.

Ginsberg, a legendary Supreme Court Justice and hero to many liberal causes, had her eyes fixed to a TV watching news of Boof Kavanaugh’s confirmation while sharpening over sixty pencils down to the nib.

Reports say Ginsberg stayed motionless all night, sharpening pencils with a furious and terrifying look in her eye.

The Trump-nominated Brett Cab-Sav-anaugh was confirmed to the lifetime appointment on the USA’s highest court, even after several accusations of sexual misconduct and drunkenness, or what Senate Republicans call “qualifications”.

In a statement the Notorious RBG said she is looking forward to “welcoming” her new conservative colleague, with whom she will sit on the Supreme Court until “one of us dies in mysterious but totally untraceable circumstances.”

She then asked her assistant for a new pencil to sharpen before she got worked up again.