UN genuinely torn who to back in this whole Trump/North Korea thing

The UN is genuinely unsure who to throw its support behind as tensions between a Trump-led United States and North Korea rise.

At the UN General Assembly today US President Donald Trump gave his maiden speech to a room of awkward creaking sounds as diplomats shifted in their seats uncomfortably.

Trump’s speech to the UN reinforced his tough language towards North Korea, threatening to “totally destroy” the country, but only after they find out if there is any oil worth getting out.

A UK representative from the Security Council spoke to the media outside soon after.

“North Korea is an obscene regime run by a psychopathic despot who suffocates freedoms and tortures dissidents. They represent an impending and potentially fatal threat to the world.”

“But then Donald Trump man… it’s a tricky choice.”

It is understood that the UN Ambassador to Sweden called his wife from his hotel room last night, loosening his tie and hitting the minibar.

Other UN diplomats have been spotted wandering the streets late into the night, visiting various monuments with hands in their pockets in a clear moral quandary.

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