A group of rich men in wigs have won the argument for a nationwide postal vote on gay marriage.

This afternoon the High Court delivered its ruling on the challenge to the government’s totally reasonable and cost effective plebiscite, which will see all registered voters cast a ballot. If they want to. And then the government will vote as the people did. If they want to.

The line of legal representatives and barristers arguing in support of the postal vote preened their wigs in celebration as the verdict was announced.

Gerald Hapersham, one of the barristers representing the government in the case, reiterated his support for the plebiscite outside the High Court this afternoon.

“The justices on the High Court don’t wear wigs, so it wasn’t looking good for us from the start. I’m just pleased they recognised that this country has a strong foundation in our respect for tradition.”

And with a flourish of his tailormade robe he was gone.